We have all heard 'Practice Makes Perfect'. Practice is doing something repeatedly in order to do it well and once you learn to do it well, you practice to do it better. Whether it is shooting a basketball or preparing for a speech, practice is your best ally. But what is it that keeps you practicing? It is Discipline.
Our society enjoys sports. We gather in bars and fill stadiums to watch athletes execute almost perfectly. Whether it is a fighter or a football player, we are in awe and entertained by their almost super human skills. But those skills we so admire do not happen overnight. When a boxer steps into a ring or a basketball player steps unto the court and they execute, what you are watching is the culmination of 1000's of repetitive moves and hours of dedication. What kept them repeating the same move over and over again, day in and day out, hardly letting up, is Discipline.
Naturally we are not a disciplined species. We love what feels good all the time. We run from discomfort. Anything that is outside our comfort zone, we shy away from. Discipline is like an internal drill sergeant that yells at us to get our asses up when we want to roll over and enjoy more sleep. It tells us that it is not time to go home when everyone else have retired for the night. Discipline tells you not to eat that slice of cake or drink that Coke. Whatever your objective is, Discipline is necessary to stay on the right track towards it.
So how does one attain Discipline? Like most good qualities in life, Discipline can be developed. Think of the first thing you do when you get up in the morning. What is it? Do you reach for the TV remote? Head straight into the kitchen? Here is an idea for how you can begin to develop discipline in your life. Since each day is a new opportunity for you to live the rest of your life start with something that will require Discipline at first; Make your bed.
That's it. Make your bed. Make your bed every day. There will be days when you don't feel like making your bed. Do it anyways. Start your day having accomplished a task to improve your life. A made bed is a very good way to start your day. It is an accomplishment. At first it will take Discipline to keep you doing this if you have not been used to making your bed. Eventually you will do so out of habit. You have created a good habit. Congratulations!
Now, what are you after? A better paying job? Making a team? Winning a championship? Whatever it is, understand the Discipline that made it possible to accomplish that first task in the morning is not limited. It is there to help you with whatever your goals are. You just need to heed it, not ignore it. The more disciplined you become in various areas of your life, the more structure you will find in those areas of your life.
Whatever your goal is, think of yourself as an athlete competing to attain it. Put yourself in the mindset of an athlete. Then employ Discipline to keep at it to make yourself better. You will reap if you do not grow weary.
Copyright � 2020, M.A.Singh. All rights reserved.
M.A.Singh
Article Source: https://EzineArticles.com/expert/Mark_A._Singh/191165
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/10304224
Showing posts with label control. Show all posts
Showing posts with label control. Show all posts
Saturday, 13 June 2020
Friday, 12 June 2020
How Complaining Can Make Us Fall Sick
Why do we love to talk about our problems? What do we get out of it? Whenever we catch up with friends over talking inevitably leads to some sort of complaints. It could be about work, our spouse, our children, our community and so on.
The thing is because we are repeating a pattern we do not realise the impact it has on us. For most people, unfortunately, this seems to be a normal habit of conversing.
So why do we feel the need to keep talking about our problems? Here are some probable emotional reasons:
Perhaps we want to feel validated? We want to feel like we mean something to someone. I was observing my daughter and her friends and they were gossiping and complaining about someone else and I realised that it was their way to feel validated. It was their way to feel like they are part of the in-crowd.
Another reason could be, we want to feel right. So by complaining, we are saying that we are right and the other party is wrong. So by complaining, it seems as if we have tipped the scales and somehow in an imaginary way we have become right, even if we were wrong!
Sometimes things do happen in such a way where we are wrongly accused. And the other party is just not listening. So we want to keep talking about it to make ourselves feel right again. In a way, we do it to fight for fairness or fair treatment but then we keep going into the loop of complaining!
Yet another reason why we enjoy complaining is that we are trying to get opinions. Why opinions? Because we are not sure whether the problem is us or the problem is with other people or whether the problem is circumstances. We share to get an opinion and if someone else agrees with us we think 'OK, so I am right, this problem I am having is not really my problem it is their problem'. It is a way to feel 'one up'.
What happens to the one listening to the complainer? For some of us, when we listen to other people's problems we may start to feel drained if we do not know how to draw psychic boundaries. They feel more energised because they are releasing and if full attention is given to them, we are giving even more power to their issues.
If we are an empathetic person, we are in for a lot of energy drainage because we feel like the other person wants so much from us -- they want our opinions, they want us to commit to a side. I'm just imagining some of the empaths now nodding away as you read this.
If we are the complainer when we keep talking about our problems we will only keep building negative energies within. We have these energy centres within our energy body and they are mostly aligned with our Endocrine System. Our Endocrine System is made up of our glands that control our hormones. When I say hormones, we are not just talking about women's hormones or sex hormones. Hormones are chemical substance produced in our bodies and they serve as messengers, controlling and coordinating activities throughout our body. For eg. adrenaline is a hormone and it comes under the control of our nervous system.
We have all experienced this phenomenon of being heartbroken. During this lovesickness, we feel the ache in our chest area, because feeling that way has caused an imbalance in our hormones and our Thymus gland sits right there and the love sickness actually caused us to compromise our immune system. This gland interesting is also known as the love gland!
So I teach my clients this: when you feel emotionally compromised, tap lightly on your chest, which activates your thymus gland. The tapping allows the gland function better and it can also help with your immunity. Just tap lightly up to about eight times, you don't have to thump like a gorilla! (I think gorillas really have the right idea on how to live right) You also do not need a reason to do this, you can do this all the time as a practice to help rebalance your hormones. So I do this all the time, especially when I am waiting in line with nothing to do!
In my next blog post, I will share strategies on how to draw psychic boundaries if you are the listener and what you can do more constructively if you are the complainer.
In the meantime, have a fabulous week tapping your chest away!
My clients call me the chiropractor for the soul because it is what I do best. I align my clients with their body, mind and soul. The end game - to live more purposeful lives. I have a deep love for psychology, all things spiritual and non-religious. Join me and over 250k followers on my Facebook: http://www.Facebook.com/BeSpiritualandrich and visit my website http://www.ShamalaTan.com
Article Source: https://EzineArticles.com/expert/Shamala_Tan/291063
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/10032506
The thing is because we are repeating a pattern we do not realise the impact it has on us. For most people, unfortunately, this seems to be a normal habit of conversing.
So why do we feel the need to keep talking about our problems? Here are some probable emotional reasons:
Perhaps we want to feel validated? We want to feel like we mean something to someone. I was observing my daughter and her friends and they were gossiping and complaining about someone else and I realised that it was their way to feel validated. It was their way to feel like they are part of the in-crowd.
Another reason could be, we want to feel right. So by complaining, we are saying that we are right and the other party is wrong. So by complaining, it seems as if we have tipped the scales and somehow in an imaginary way we have become right, even if we were wrong!
Sometimes things do happen in such a way where we are wrongly accused. And the other party is just not listening. So we want to keep talking about it to make ourselves feel right again. In a way, we do it to fight for fairness or fair treatment but then we keep going into the loop of complaining!
Yet another reason why we enjoy complaining is that we are trying to get opinions. Why opinions? Because we are not sure whether the problem is us or the problem is with other people or whether the problem is circumstances. We share to get an opinion and if someone else agrees with us we think 'OK, so I am right, this problem I am having is not really my problem it is their problem'. It is a way to feel 'one up'.
What happens to the one listening to the complainer? For some of us, when we listen to other people's problems we may start to feel drained if we do not know how to draw psychic boundaries. They feel more energised because they are releasing and if full attention is given to them, we are giving even more power to their issues.
If we are an empathetic person, we are in for a lot of energy drainage because we feel like the other person wants so much from us -- they want our opinions, they want us to commit to a side. I'm just imagining some of the empaths now nodding away as you read this.
If we are the complainer when we keep talking about our problems we will only keep building negative energies within. We have these energy centres within our energy body and they are mostly aligned with our Endocrine System. Our Endocrine System is made up of our glands that control our hormones. When I say hormones, we are not just talking about women's hormones or sex hormones. Hormones are chemical substance produced in our bodies and they serve as messengers, controlling and coordinating activities throughout our body. For eg. adrenaline is a hormone and it comes under the control of our nervous system.
We have all experienced this phenomenon of being heartbroken. During this lovesickness, we feel the ache in our chest area, because feeling that way has caused an imbalance in our hormones and our Thymus gland sits right there and the love sickness actually caused us to compromise our immune system. This gland interesting is also known as the love gland!
So I teach my clients this: when you feel emotionally compromised, tap lightly on your chest, which activates your thymus gland. The tapping allows the gland function better and it can also help with your immunity. Just tap lightly up to about eight times, you don't have to thump like a gorilla! (I think gorillas really have the right idea on how to live right) You also do not need a reason to do this, you can do this all the time as a practice to help rebalance your hormones. So I do this all the time, especially when I am waiting in line with nothing to do!
In my next blog post, I will share strategies on how to draw psychic boundaries if you are the listener and what you can do more constructively if you are the complainer.
In the meantime, have a fabulous week tapping your chest away!
My clients call me the chiropractor for the soul because it is what I do best. I align my clients with their body, mind and soul. The end game - to live more purposeful lives. I have a deep love for psychology, all things spiritual and non-religious. Join me and over 250k followers on my Facebook: http://www.Facebook.com/BeSpiritualandrich and visit my website http://www.ShamalaTan.com
Article Source: https://EzineArticles.com/expert/Shamala_Tan/291063
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/10032506
Tuesday, 9 June 2020
Saturday, 6 June 2020
Are You an Optimist or a Pessimist?
This is actually a trick question, as few of us are completely optimistic or completely pessimistic. That said, most people do tend to lean more heavily towards one over the other.
It is difficult to get good research data on the percentages, as people who lean towards pessimism do not usually admit they are pessimists. The most recent study I could find was in 2013 and in it, it listed 50% of Americans identifying as being optimists, which seems (rather ironically) fitting considering the standard way many of us evaluate whether someone is an optimist or a pessimist is whether they see the glass as half-full or half-empty
The problem is, that of the remaining 50%, only 4% identified themselves as pessimists. I know this is not very scientific, but I see a lot more Debbie-Downers walking around where I live than 4%. I'm guessing a majority of the 43% who identified as "somewhere in-between" are more heavily pessimistic, as an optimistic person would likely have jumped at the chance to identify themselves as an optimist. Conversely, a pessimistic person would likely be fearful of jumping to that conclusion, but also fearful of labeling themselves a pessimist as well.
You'd be hard pressed to come up with many great historical leaders or inventors who were pessimists (I cannot think of any off the top of my head). But that does not mean we do not need pessimists too. If leaders surround themselves solely with other optimists they are likely to miss the changing currents around them. Some professions lend themselves to pessimism such as CPA's, Safety Engineers and Actuaries just to name a few.
Pessimists tend to think of themselves as realistic and most things in life need a balance of realists and dreamers. I consider myself an optimistic realist. My clients rely on me to "Keep it real," and at the same time help them find inventive ways to better themselves.
It's imperative that I give each client things that help them get from where they are now, to where they want to be in the future. It would be overly optimistic to teach an 11-year old who is still learning their craft, the same things I teach professionals, who are already at the top of theirs.
Although pessimists serve a purpose in society, I cannot think of a good reason anyone would rather be one. I can however, think of several advantages of being an optimist over a pessimist. Optimists tend to be upbeat, have higher goals, and achieve more than pessimists. They are also considerably less likely to give up in the face of challenges or negative forces they experience.
Many people are of the mistaken belief that you are born either an optimist or a pessimist. I have found that each and every one of us have the ability to become an optimist, if we make that choice. It's really no different than someone with poor eyesight. They can choose to live with their bad eyesight or they can get lenses that enable them to see clearly. Pessimists can similarly learn to view things through a corrective lens in their mind and change their entire outlook.
It's rare to run across a peak performer who is not an optimist at heart. I have worked with clients that came to me with a pessimistic bent and the ones who were willing to work to change their outlook were the ones who achieved at higher levels. I believe there is a degree of self-fulfilling prophecy at work in being an optimist as well.
As Norman Cousins eloquently stated, "Optimism doesn't wait on facts. It deals with prospects. Pessimism is a waste of time." The bottom line is, no mater where you fall on the Pessimism/Optimism scale you have the power to change it.
You can follow Sam on Twitter @SuperTaoInc
POSTED IN THE MIND SIDE BLOG
Sam Obitz is a leader in the use and development of mental skills that help you achieve peak performance. Visit The Mind Side Blog at http://supertao.com/category/the-mind-side-blog/
Article Source: https://EzineArticles.com/expert/Sam_Obitz/796527
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/10230752
It is difficult to get good research data on the percentages, as people who lean towards pessimism do not usually admit they are pessimists. The most recent study I could find was in 2013 and in it, it listed 50% of Americans identifying as being optimists, which seems (rather ironically) fitting considering the standard way many of us evaluate whether someone is an optimist or a pessimist is whether they see the glass as half-full or half-empty
The problem is, that of the remaining 50%, only 4% identified themselves as pessimists. I know this is not very scientific, but I see a lot more Debbie-Downers walking around where I live than 4%. I'm guessing a majority of the 43% who identified as "somewhere in-between" are more heavily pessimistic, as an optimistic person would likely have jumped at the chance to identify themselves as an optimist. Conversely, a pessimistic person would likely be fearful of jumping to that conclusion, but also fearful of labeling themselves a pessimist as well.
You'd be hard pressed to come up with many great historical leaders or inventors who were pessimists (I cannot think of any off the top of my head). But that does not mean we do not need pessimists too. If leaders surround themselves solely with other optimists they are likely to miss the changing currents around them. Some professions lend themselves to pessimism such as CPA's, Safety Engineers and Actuaries just to name a few.
Pessimists tend to think of themselves as realistic and most things in life need a balance of realists and dreamers. I consider myself an optimistic realist. My clients rely on me to "Keep it real," and at the same time help them find inventive ways to better themselves.
It's imperative that I give each client things that help them get from where they are now, to where they want to be in the future. It would be overly optimistic to teach an 11-year old who is still learning their craft, the same things I teach professionals, who are already at the top of theirs.
Although pessimists serve a purpose in society, I cannot think of a good reason anyone would rather be one. I can however, think of several advantages of being an optimist over a pessimist. Optimists tend to be upbeat, have higher goals, and achieve more than pessimists. They are also considerably less likely to give up in the face of challenges or negative forces they experience.
Many people are of the mistaken belief that you are born either an optimist or a pessimist. I have found that each and every one of us have the ability to become an optimist, if we make that choice. It's really no different than someone with poor eyesight. They can choose to live with their bad eyesight or they can get lenses that enable them to see clearly. Pessimists can similarly learn to view things through a corrective lens in their mind and change their entire outlook.
It's rare to run across a peak performer who is not an optimist at heart. I have worked with clients that came to me with a pessimistic bent and the ones who were willing to work to change their outlook were the ones who achieved at higher levels. I believe there is a degree of self-fulfilling prophecy at work in being an optimist as well.
As Norman Cousins eloquently stated, "Optimism doesn't wait on facts. It deals with prospects. Pessimism is a waste of time." The bottom line is, no mater where you fall on the Pessimism/Optimism scale you have the power to change it.
You can follow Sam on Twitter @SuperTaoInc
POSTED IN THE MIND SIDE BLOG
Sam Obitz is a leader in the use and development of mental skills that help you achieve peak performance. Visit The Mind Side Blog at http://supertao.com/category/the-mind-side-blog/
Article Source: https://EzineArticles.com/expert/Sam_Obitz/796527
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/10230752
Wednesday, 3 June 2020
Simplify to Multiply
I don't know why you want to improve your mind.
I don't know whether you want to perform better in business, studies or on the field.
Or if you want to supercharge your career, as an employee or entrepreneur.
Or you simply want to live your full potential.
In any case, you can improve yourself in counterintuitive ways.
I got to thinking about this when my mind dug up something I haven't thought about in ages:
Many years ago, I read an article from someone who had just upgraded their mobile phone.
Before the upgrade, they could make calls and send texts. And they'd text maybe twice a day, and call twice a week.
Then they got their new, fancy phone with (gasp) internet capabilities.
Now, they were on their phone all the time.
What confused and even troubled them was what this meant for their telco of choice.
Back when they barely used it, they paid (say) $30 a month.
Now they're glued to it, they were paying around $40 or $50 bucks a month.
The economics of that can't hold! Every phone provider has gone mad and is teetering on the brink of financial ruin!
... right?
Well, history shows it wasn't so. That was a very good time to sell mobile phone plans.
So, what gives?
Were the older phone plans so overpriced, there was enough slack to handle this shift?
That's likely, sure.
Were they making most of their profits from elsewhere - say, business plans as opposed to individuals?
Probably, but they weren't making a loss on plans for individuals.
Was it simply economies of scale? More users, so they could make it up in volume?
That was probably a factor.
But one thing that really helped - at least, by my limited understanding of telecommunications - was what they did in the core networks.
Or what businesses would call the back-end.
The earliest mobile phones could make calls - barely.
Then engineers tweaked the signals to carry more data, which let them provide text messages and limited data. Enough for, say, basic news and weather apps.
But then the mobile internet started becoming a thing, so they had to build two networks - one for calls and texts, the other for their laughably rudimentary internet. Plus they had to get these two networks to talk to each other.
It was, I'm sure, a real hassle.
So when the next generation of technology came around, they integrated it all into one network. Calls, texts, data - all going through the same system.
The end user enjoyed faster, more reliable and better integrated services.
The telco enjoyed having one system to maintain, not two.
This, I would guess, helped them keep the price down while revolutionising what they offered.
Which brings me to your call-to-action:
There are places in your life and in your mind that could use a little of this.
Simplifying a process to create a more sophisticated output.
Consolidation, integration and streamlining, to remove the friction points in your thinking and actions. Some of it might involve your external circumstances - say, outsourcing your chores to free up your time.
And some of it will come from thinking hard about your own thinking.
This is your challenge: where in life can you simplify to multiply your results?
So that's one way to enhance your life.
But if self-improvement really interests you, what would you do with more techniques than you can use?
Like, say, 60 of them?
Get your hands on Three-Score Navike - the comprehensive and easy way to grow and evolve - right here:
https://guided-thought.com/navike/
Article Source: https://EzineArticles.com/expert/William_T_Batten/2522089
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/10299517
I don't know whether you want to perform better in business, studies or on the field.
Or if you want to supercharge your career, as an employee or entrepreneur.
Or you simply want to live your full potential.
In any case, you can improve yourself in counterintuitive ways.
I got to thinking about this when my mind dug up something I haven't thought about in ages:
Many years ago, I read an article from someone who had just upgraded their mobile phone.
Before the upgrade, they could make calls and send texts. And they'd text maybe twice a day, and call twice a week.
Then they got their new, fancy phone with (gasp) internet capabilities.
Now, they were on their phone all the time.
What confused and even troubled them was what this meant for their telco of choice.
Back when they barely used it, they paid (say) $30 a month.
Now they're glued to it, they were paying around $40 or $50 bucks a month.
The economics of that can't hold! Every phone provider has gone mad and is teetering on the brink of financial ruin!
... right?
Well, history shows it wasn't so. That was a very good time to sell mobile phone plans.
So, what gives?
Were the older phone plans so overpriced, there was enough slack to handle this shift?
That's likely, sure.
Were they making most of their profits from elsewhere - say, business plans as opposed to individuals?
Probably, but they weren't making a loss on plans for individuals.
Was it simply economies of scale? More users, so they could make it up in volume?
That was probably a factor.
But one thing that really helped - at least, by my limited understanding of telecommunications - was what they did in the core networks.
Or what businesses would call the back-end.
The earliest mobile phones could make calls - barely.
Then engineers tweaked the signals to carry more data, which let them provide text messages and limited data. Enough for, say, basic news and weather apps.
But then the mobile internet started becoming a thing, so they had to build two networks - one for calls and texts, the other for their laughably rudimentary internet. Plus they had to get these two networks to talk to each other.
It was, I'm sure, a real hassle.
So when the next generation of technology came around, they integrated it all into one network. Calls, texts, data - all going through the same system.
The end user enjoyed faster, more reliable and better integrated services.
The telco enjoyed having one system to maintain, not two.
This, I would guess, helped them keep the price down while revolutionising what they offered.
Which brings me to your call-to-action:
There are places in your life and in your mind that could use a little of this.
Simplifying a process to create a more sophisticated output.
Consolidation, integration and streamlining, to remove the friction points in your thinking and actions. Some of it might involve your external circumstances - say, outsourcing your chores to free up your time.
And some of it will come from thinking hard about your own thinking.
This is your challenge: where in life can you simplify to multiply your results?
So that's one way to enhance your life.
But if self-improvement really interests you, what would you do with more techniques than you can use?
Like, say, 60 of them?
Get your hands on Three-Score Navike - the comprehensive and easy way to grow and evolve - right here:
https://guided-thought.com/navike/
Article Source: https://EzineArticles.com/expert/William_T_Batten/2522089
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/10299517
Tuesday, 2 June 2020
Not Me By Alexa Keating
When we continue to accept behaviors and situations that are not aligned with the path we have chosen for our life, we need to ask why. The mere fact that we do not question it is consenting to allowing other people to control our behavior unconsciously.
Why do we keep doing this? Why do we keep making excuses for bad behavior or for those who do not follow through on promises or commitments? If we are willing to ask the question, 'why' we move forward in leaps and bounds from an illusion that serves no purpose to us. We move into the presence of reality. Instead of being incapacitated by the unknown, we can move forward in our own planned life journey.
Think about the power of intermittent reinforcement in our emotional lives. This is what gets gamblers and addicts hooked. It is what causes very intelligent people to remain in terrible relationships. If it were always bad, you would leave. It is those intermittent 'good times', and wins or highs for the addict, that keep us hooked and returning for more. But you see how the lives of most gamblers and addicts turn out in the end. It is the same with people in our lives who are a part of unhealthy relationships. The results are rarely worth the price of the ride. And, intermittent is as good as it gets; just enough to keep you coming back for more.
How much of this intermittent reward keeps us hooked to our delusions; forces us back to the denial of the real situation? All of this happens because, for a moment, things were better or good.
The good news is that when we wake up in the dream we call our life journey, we realize we chose those poisonous situations to intensify our need to embrace higher values, a higher perception of how we need to see ourselves. Sometimes we create life situations that are guaranteed to make us crash! A head-on crash, so that we have no choice but to wake the hell up and alter our course.
How powerful denial and delusion can be when we are avoiding the big mirror! What is it that we are so afraid to confront in ourselves? What is that dread we wake up with in the morning when it feels like there is something missing? What is that?
It is probably that our good friends and companions, denial and delusion are not yet awake and in control of our emotions. They act as a drug in and of themselves. We become addicted to them and their calming and soothing effects.
It is a lot like being addicted to a computer game. Your screen, or your life view, will reflect dramatic wins that you may even talk about and enjoy; yet, when you turn off the computer, the game vanishes into thin air, a delusion. It was always in the virtual world; it will never show up to accept responsibility for the actions it pervades. These companions are the proverbial 'Not Me's' in your life. You can't find their miserable backsides when it is time to be accountable for your actions. Just like the virtual games, only you can see the wins.
If you are caught up in playing the victim in your game of life, where are you playing that role? At work, as a parent, in an intimate relationship? It an odd fact that those who appear strong and fearless at work may step into the door of their home and immediately assume the role of an abused victim. Publicly they appear as strong and in control people; privately they are emotionally or physically abused if they are caught in this pattern. How does that happen?
Humans instinctively seek to survive and at some level, live out their life dreams. If you are caught in a web of deception and delusion in a relationship, it is not uncommon for you to shine in your work, or vice versa. This is the soul of the dreamer seeking some method to express the joy they originally planned.
We are all born to win; playing a victim is another expression of unhealthy boundaries we have embraced.
It also provides a way to become 'Not Me' when you can excuse the actions you have taken and the choices you have made by blaming someone else for robbing you of your choices. We are our own bandits and thief's in this scenario.
Behold; the head on collision delivering the results of your wrong actions and bad choices. If you are going to survive the ride on your life journey, something has to wake you up so you can navigate the trip successfully.
Imagine that you have chosen a destination and get into your car, buckle the seat belt, start the engine and then proceed to look through the rear view mirror to arrive at your desired destination. You are looking for direction in the mirror that provides the least amount of valuable information, rather than choosing to look through the large expansive windshield that is before you. When you continue the same methods that allowed you to arrive at your current destination, it provides the same effect as navigating through the rear view mirror.
If you have a sense of dread about something it is time to honestly examine where the great sense of power originated that became attached to the thing you dread most. What are you running from? What do you dread and why? How can you disarm this opponent? Can you make a different choice, choose a better path; are you captive because you fear the change? A sense of dread forces you to play the victim's role, a powerless position to assume.
What are you the most disillusioned about in your life? Have you identified the actual issue that is so disillusioning to you? Did you play a part in creating this issue? Are you willing to stop playing that role if you are a part of it?
You cannot win this battle until you are able to be honest with yourself about what it is. Then examine how it became reality; once you have done this, you are in a position to go to battle and win this one in your life.
We all have an addiction to something. If you are in the throes of an unhealthy one, trade it for something that is good for you; good for your path and your life journey. Then stop being a party to continuing the old addiction.
These are simple words that require a deep commitment to change if you want to honestly effect a change. You cannot 'go along to get along' and imagine that things have changed.
Alexa Keating is a healing and transformative writer with 32 published books and 500 + articles available on Ezine articles.
The most important writing goal for me is that my words be healing, transformative, informative and humorous whenever possible; laughter lifts the soul! For more information please join me on my web site at http://www.arkconnect.com. I appreciate every person who takes the time to peruse, read and share my work with me.
Article Source: https://EzineArticles.com/expert/Alexa_Keating/1883665
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/10288639
Why do we keep doing this? Why do we keep making excuses for bad behavior or for those who do not follow through on promises or commitments? If we are willing to ask the question, 'why' we move forward in leaps and bounds from an illusion that serves no purpose to us. We move into the presence of reality. Instead of being incapacitated by the unknown, we can move forward in our own planned life journey.
Think about the power of intermittent reinforcement in our emotional lives. This is what gets gamblers and addicts hooked. It is what causes very intelligent people to remain in terrible relationships. If it were always bad, you would leave. It is those intermittent 'good times', and wins or highs for the addict, that keep us hooked and returning for more. But you see how the lives of most gamblers and addicts turn out in the end. It is the same with people in our lives who are a part of unhealthy relationships. The results are rarely worth the price of the ride. And, intermittent is as good as it gets; just enough to keep you coming back for more.
How much of this intermittent reward keeps us hooked to our delusions; forces us back to the denial of the real situation? All of this happens because, for a moment, things were better or good.
The good news is that when we wake up in the dream we call our life journey, we realize we chose those poisonous situations to intensify our need to embrace higher values, a higher perception of how we need to see ourselves. Sometimes we create life situations that are guaranteed to make us crash! A head-on crash, so that we have no choice but to wake the hell up and alter our course.
How powerful denial and delusion can be when we are avoiding the big mirror! What is it that we are so afraid to confront in ourselves? What is that dread we wake up with in the morning when it feels like there is something missing? What is that?
It is probably that our good friends and companions, denial and delusion are not yet awake and in control of our emotions. They act as a drug in and of themselves. We become addicted to them and their calming and soothing effects.
It is a lot like being addicted to a computer game. Your screen, or your life view, will reflect dramatic wins that you may even talk about and enjoy; yet, when you turn off the computer, the game vanishes into thin air, a delusion. It was always in the virtual world; it will never show up to accept responsibility for the actions it pervades. These companions are the proverbial 'Not Me's' in your life. You can't find their miserable backsides when it is time to be accountable for your actions. Just like the virtual games, only you can see the wins.
If you are caught up in playing the victim in your game of life, where are you playing that role? At work, as a parent, in an intimate relationship? It an odd fact that those who appear strong and fearless at work may step into the door of their home and immediately assume the role of an abused victim. Publicly they appear as strong and in control people; privately they are emotionally or physically abused if they are caught in this pattern. How does that happen?
Humans instinctively seek to survive and at some level, live out their life dreams. If you are caught in a web of deception and delusion in a relationship, it is not uncommon for you to shine in your work, or vice versa. This is the soul of the dreamer seeking some method to express the joy they originally planned.
We are all born to win; playing a victim is another expression of unhealthy boundaries we have embraced.
It also provides a way to become 'Not Me' when you can excuse the actions you have taken and the choices you have made by blaming someone else for robbing you of your choices. We are our own bandits and thief's in this scenario.
Behold; the head on collision delivering the results of your wrong actions and bad choices. If you are going to survive the ride on your life journey, something has to wake you up so you can navigate the trip successfully.
Imagine that you have chosen a destination and get into your car, buckle the seat belt, start the engine and then proceed to look through the rear view mirror to arrive at your desired destination. You are looking for direction in the mirror that provides the least amount of valuable information, rather than choosing to look through the large expansive windshield that is before you. When you continue the same methods that allowed you to arrive at your current destination, it provides the same effect as navigating through the rear view mirror.
If you have a sense of dread about something it is time to honestly examine where the great sense of power originated that became attached to the thing you dread most. What are you running from? What do you dread and why? How can you disarm this opponent? Can you make a different choice, choose a better path; are you captive because you fear the change? A sense of dread forces you to play the victim's role, a powerless position to assume.
What are you the most disillusioned about in your life? Have you identified the actual issue that is so disillusioning to you? Did you play a part in creating this issue? Are you willing to stop playing that role if you are a part of it?
You cannot win this battle until you are able to be honest with yourself about what it is. Then examine how it became reality; once you have done this, you are in a position to go to battle and win this one in your life.
We all have an addiction to something. If you are in the throes of an unhealthy one, trade it for something that is good for you; good for your path and your life journey. Then stop being a party to continuing the old addiction.
These are simple words that require a deep commitment to change if you want to honestly effect a change. You cannot 'go along to get along' and imagine that things have changed.
Alexa Keating is a healing and transformative writer with 32 published books and 500 + articles available on Ezine articles.
The most important writing goal for me is that my words be healing, transformative, informative and humorous whenever possible; laughter lifts the soul! For more information please join me on my web site at http://www.arkconnect.com. I appreciate every person who takes the time to peruse, read and share my work with me.
Article Source: https://EzineArticles.com/expert/Alexa_Keating/1883665
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